Our tax dollars buy bullying, not representation — The US of A is no longer a melting pot or even a salad bowl. Instead, rich Ol’ Uncle Sam is all about keeping our preferred colors separate — Blue rights, Red lefts, Green money dominant — while paying lip service to rainbows and equity. We Are Broken Do politicians’ parents teach them…

How to respond when the Grim Hacker invites you for drinks — R.S.V.Peeing to the Grim Hacker, aka Grimsby Hackney — Thanks for inviting me to your fantasy pre-dinner drinking session. I’ll be there toting a box of Peter Vella Cabernet Sauvignon, which per their website is “created in a light-bodied, easy-to-enjoy style with soft notes of cherry fruit and a wonderfully smooth finish.” For those without a clue,

It didn’t warp me in any meaningful way — My father was a freethinker regarding movies the way my mother was about books. He’d take me to any movie of my choice when I visited during school vacations. I remember seeing Easy Rider with him, which was released in 1969. I turned 11 in 1969. He lived in a…

Mudditors are set up to fail, so that $100 is yours — Have you ever failed? Are you failing now? Yes, unless you recently submitted a funny story to MuddyUm about failure. Contest rules are below — look for the skulls 💀. We just can’t win but apparently, editors are encouraged to participate. Gary Chapin appreciates Mudditorial participation, also known as advertising…

Laughing our way to the piggybank with help from ChatGPT — It’s my first time using ChatGPT for new story titles. From my prompts, which didn’t define GRRR, ChatGPT suggested the title & subtitle below for this newsletter — second in the Grammarly series. Grammarly, the Unholy Enemy of GRRR: A Hilarious Take on the Perils of Automated Grammar Correction Laughing…

The lament of an envious writers retreat nonparticipant — She asked a free-spirited tipster, “Why the H should I go to Puhkipser?” He consulted his balls, Then made a few calls — And predicted a few tipsy quipsters. She thought off the bat, oh what fun — There’s a jolly good chance of some puns. …

An homage to ‘Shaving Cream’ with apologies to Benny Bell & Dr. Demento — For Those Who Aren’t Familiar — ‘Shaving Cream’ is a novelty song wherein the rhymed word — which begins with the letters SH — is replaced by “shaving cream” and the second & fourth lines in each verse rhyme with “it.” I chose FU & “fudge ice cream” along with “ck.” Fudge Ice Cream There’s times when I want…

What if Grammarly and ChatGPT had a baby? — If ChatGPT informed Grammarly, we might really have something. The titles above “Writers Weigh In” are my ChatGPT prompts. Back-ticked text highlighted in grey is ChatGPT’s response — slightly edited. Can you tell which parts are me? The only bad writer is a Grammarly denier If you refuse to use Grammarly, you might as well be wearing a…

An Editor Fairy ‘read this first’ index — 🏴‍☠️ Welcome aboard the Good Ship MuddyUm! 🏴‍☠️ This piece is but a table scrap of informative plunder from the trove hoarded under our Outlaws tab. Binge on those wordy nuggets if you want, but definitely START HERE! It’s daunting to read all >42 guidelines, tutorials, & other piratical nuts…